I was thinking today about reputation.Of course, I know the rep I have as a student pastor, a pastor and a follower of Christ.My reputation is based on things that I have chosen to purposefully pursue.Yes, it is true, I have a reputation that I have purposefully developed because of my passions. I think it is very telling that when I grew up in Chicago, going to a great church for sure, going to a very different High School, getting involved in sports and other things… My rents often talked to me about reputation.My reputation they worried as a Christian was in their mind all about what others my perceive or think of me—but it was not about how I lived this following of Christ—it was more about how I looked first.That would lead to the question my mom would and still asks “What will people think?”The question was 9 times out of 10 about me not doing this “Christian” things the way their peers at church did it or the way they thought those same Christians lived their Christianity out in front of others.
I found myself as a follower of Christ worrying about the same things at first… at first.I found myself looking over my shoulder constantly.Was I doing it right?Was I good enough for those people my parents worried about?Was I good enough period.Was I doing it right?I know full well that the above questions are real and true.I felt it.I lived it.I know that many, many others feel the same way.I worked in a bike shop, I have neighbors, I worked in corporate world.Every place, work and hood, people would say to me something like this—“I don’t go to church, I don’t fit.”“I don’t go, people will judge me.”“ I can’t be around Christians, they are so judgmental.”“I’m not good enough.”“I’m whatever….”
I often think about reputation.I often think about what is the ministry I am doing’s reputation?I certainly don’t want it to be about some other person’s idea of ministry.I certainly don’t want it to be the reputation of somebody else.I certainly don’t want it to be all about me.No—quite the contrary.I want it to be the reputation of Christ.After all, those that follow Christ—ummm follow Christ.Hopefully, I am a good rep of Christ.Hopefully I represent Him in all I do—at home, when I am alone, when I am in my hood, and when I am at church.Hopefully all the time.But and this is a huge BUT—I don’t want my reputation to look like what others think it should be—ever.And that is the rub for me.I have given up on that along time ago.Why?Because I lived that life for my parents and those in the church where I grew up.Truthfully, it did absolutely nada for me and for my relationship with Christ.
I found out long ago that the crowd is not worth living for—ever.Funny, how parents will talk about the crowd and not pleasing them… of course that is the crowd—the worldly crowd, but on the other hand—the other crowd—well that is o.k.—the Christian crowd—now that crowd has something to say.Should they?Should the Christian crowd be the determining factor?Not for me.Why should anyone worry about what others think when one is following Christ?(by the way, I asked when they are FOLLOWING CHRIST not, when they call themselves a christian but don't follow Christ) Why do we give so much power to people?We shouldn’t and that is the rub.
